Be careful what you dream of
It may come up and surprise you
Christopher Adrian Layhe / Robert Ian Mcnabb
So goes the opening line of Hollow Horse by The Icicle Works. It’s bound to fill our manager, Billy George, with good Christmas cheer. I know it’s one of his favourites. I think I’m right in saying that, under the guise of Honk Promotions, Billy booked lead singer Ian McNabb for a brilliant gig at PJ Molloy’s.
There was a technical issue during the first four songs and Ian McNabb walked off. Issue resolved, McNabb returned from the green room and started the gig anew. He played the first four songs again, continued on for ages and brought the house down.
I remember it being really loud for a lone singer/songwriter. No bad thing when the sound quality is top notch, which it was once the technical was fixed.

The chorus of Hollow Horse is memorable too.
We’ll be as we are
When all the fools
Who doubt us fade away
Christopher Adrian Layhe / Robert Ian Mcnabb
The feel good factor for Wayne…? I’m thinking Jump by Van Halen.
I get up and nothin’ gets me down
You got it tough, I’ve seen the toughest around
And I know, baby, just how you feel
You got to roll with the punches and get to what’s real
Alex Van Halen / Edward Van Halen / David Roth
Aztec Camera recorded a very gentle cover version of jump and Wayne can choose.

I’m torn over a selection for Mark. I’m thinking piano, keys, synthesizers, the mellotron and “the fucking Jennings” as Mark calls his favourite instrument at Robin Evans’ Tpot Studios, Path of Condie.

The Door’s Light My Fire or People are strange, The Beatles’ Strawberry Fields Forever or Lady Madonna, or Baba O’Riley by The Who? No, I’ve got it, for Mark it’s A Whiter Shade of Pale by Procol Harum.
We skipped the light fandango
Turned cartwheels ‘cross the floor
I was feeling kinda seasick
But the crowd called out for more
The room was humming harder
As the ceiling flew away
When we called out for another drink
The waiter brought a tray
Gary Brooker / Keith Reid / Matthew Fisher
As the BBC have shown us this Christmas, changing a famous Pogues song, it’s okay to butcher other people’s lyrics. Here’s my alternative chorus for Procol Harum’s classic.
A night out with Big Daddy
We both ended up in jail
My face, at first just ghostly
Turned a whiter shade of pale
Joe Graham (TwinsTown EDIT)
I know Kirsty MacColl sang “haggard” instead of “faggot” on Top of the Pops and a few years ago Shane McGowan couldn’t be arsed arguing about it. However, Fairytale of New York is a classic and MacColl is singing in character; a marginalised and bitter character. In the voice of that character, the lyric is true. The BBC = lyric police.
Rant over, it’s Donald time!
You can’t touch this
You can’t touch this
You can’t touch this
Break it down!
Stop, Donald time!
Rick James / Alonzo Herbert Miller / Mc HammeR
Okay I made a wee change there too. MC Hammer’s Hammer Time has been compromised. Anyway, my actual choice for Donald is of course Elton John, but not Sacrifice, oh no, it’s I’m Still Standing.
Don’t you know
I’m still standing better than I ever did
Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid
Elton John / Bernie Taupin
Yes, Donald is still standing – no thanks to Stuart.
Talking of Stuart…
The walls are closing in at night
Ain’t a friend in the World in sight
The boss man like to mess my day
Someday soon, gonna make him pay
Gonna hit him heavy gonna hit him hard
Wreck him in his wreckin’ yard
Wreck him in his wreckin’ yard
Gonna wreck him in his wreckin’ yard
stevie Agnew / Chris smith
Yes, you can count on toun legend Stevie Agnew to put a smile on Stuart’s face.

Last but not least, Harry. Last Christmas is too obvious a choice. Staying with George Michael I’ll pick Careless Whisper for The Duke.
I feel so unsure
As I take your hand and lead you to the dance floor
As the music dies
Something in your eyes
Calls to mind a silver screen
And all its sad goodbyes
Andrew J. Ridgeley / George Michael
Wayne told me that George Michael wrote Careless Whisper and added Andrew Ridgeley to the songwriting credits to ensure his Wham! band mate never had to worry about money.
C’mon Donald and Stuart, fingers oot! None of us want to worry about money either.
