Name: The Wasp aka Wayne.

Alongside Bruce Watson of The Skids and Big Country, I’ve been known to do an impression of Hale and Pace. Funny you should say that, Harry and I have been known to go on the road as a Hale and Pace tribute act.
I had heard. Bruce and I did Hale and Pace’s ‘The Management’ in Tappie Toories last year. Harry and I were just boys when we emulated Gareth and Norman, but I imagine we were better than Bruce and you. We could do ALL the comedy characters: from the sexually-inappropriate children’s TV presenters, Billy and Johnny, to The Man Who Can’t Take Anything Seriously.
Was the latter played by Harry? How did you know that!?
Oh, just a wild guess. Do you know that Ainsley Harriott appeared alongside Hale and Pace? He plays William and walks on holding a blow-up doll moments before the dominatrix appears to whip Billy and Johnny. No, that’s news to me.
Well then, you’re obviously not the top Hale and Pace impersonators you claim to be. It’s just a story Harry and I tell to impress girls.
Tribute act or no, I assume you’re fully committed to TwinsTown now? Oh aye, I quit the band every now and again, or leave our WhatsApp group, but that’s just to keep Donald and Stuart on their toes.
How is the debut album Brankholm Brae sounding? You mean Flare It!
Sorry I forgot about Harry and you preferring the name Flare It! Whatever it’s called, how’s it sounding? It sounds okay.
C’mon, Brankholm Brae is better than okay, it has your unique drumming all over it? True.
Do say: “You remind me of The Who’s Keith Moon.”
Don’t say: “Is Wayne in the band today?”